Welp…

Blog, Misc
So, here I am, sitting at the table and writing this. Not comfortably, not happily, just... Sitting and writing this out because it is about time I stopped hiding and came out and said what has been going on for the last couple months of complete and utter radio silence, because that was just unintended and before I knew it, I had just turtled up to the point that I was just gone. It lost me a good friend, it cost me some customers, and... Well, it's kind of just gotten me to the point where just looking at a computer gives me a little anxiety. I feel like I have failed, and have kept failing, and just... Yeah, I am not in a good place at all when it…
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Belated Update

Blog, Misc
So, it's been a little while since I updated here... And really since I updated anyone on anything that has been going on with me. I am not dead, but I am hanging on by a thread here. This last month or so has been utterly straining, just like the few before it, and while things are finally calming down, I must say that I am hanging on for dear life. Yeah, I know, that has been said before, but it still applies here in a big way. In the couple months I've had TFF, which ate up nearly 2 weeks all by itself, more family drama which has just been so stressful I have felt physically ill, things around the house are changing at lightning speed, and my lingering…
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Calm Down 2017

Blog, Misc
So this year has... Yeah, this has been a year so far. Relationships are crumbling around me, my family is falling apart, my house looks like it may finally cave in here soon, and I've all but completely given up on the furry fandom at this point... How has your year been so far? Starters... Kita and I aren't doing well, as usual. It's been months of struggling to try and find any sort of footing for us to really start fixing things, but it just always seems like one step forward and then two steps back with him. It isn't really even just any specific thing wrong... It's so many little things that add up and become one insurmountable thing that I just can't cope with them. Be it…
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Getting ‘It’ Back

Getting ‘It’ Back

Blog, Misc
'It'. I had 'It' at one point, and at somewhere along this past year it went running away from me screaming. I can't pin my finger on just what 'It' is, but... 'It' is gone, and 'It' hasn't come back. Whether or not that thing is drive, or passion, or just giving a rat's ass about anything at all, I don't know. All I do know is that 'It' is gone, and well, that kind of sucks for me. I've been trying to get that feeling back, of having 'It', but... I dunno, it ran off and hasn't come back. I'm working on getting 'It' back though, and I want it in a bad way. I need 'It' to really feel creative, to feel like what I write and what…
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Updates

Blog, Misc
Well, here is something new from me for the first time in a while. I haven't been able to write much in... Well, the last few months. I have been wanting to, but every time I sit down I either draw a blank, or I just lose what I had in my head because of a headache or other stressors. I don't know what to do about it, I have tried to manage it and tried to work around it, but every time I have sat down and forced myself to work, I feel as though the work that I spit out is sub-par at best. I want the best for those that I am creating for, and when I feel like I can't deliver that, well... I kind of…
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