Category: Misc

It's been nine whole days since I decided that I was going to stop working, and actually went through with it. Nine days of not knowing what to do with myself, of just trying to get adjusted, of fighting with Res and Kita, of trying to figure out finances, of family things that have me so nervous that I don't know what I am going to do... I am settling in to this new role in my life as best I can, but I am struggling for sure. I mean, between the arguing and everything else that is going on, I don't know just how it is all going to work. T Hings have began to calm down here in the last couple days, but I don't know if it…

So... This whole not working thing has been a lot harder than I thought it was going to be. I am so used to going in to work, every single day, and just busting ass for at least 10 hours. Now, I just sit at home and recover and sleep a lot... And that's about it. I am just getting used to this, and it isn't something that I know if I can get used to at this point. I am not regretting my decision, because that would be utter crap... It's just that I am feeling antsy and like I am missing out on things. I need to be doing something, and instead I am just at home doing next to nothing. I've already cleaned the whole place from…

So... A lot has happened to me since I last wrote in this. I picked up a second mate, who I don't know how things are going to work out with. I am quitting my job effective this Friday to focus on writing, which has me terrified. I am working on moving on with my career as a writer, and actually getting it started, which has me nervous to no end. I am making what I can with Res, and things have been as smooth as they can be with me having panic attacks at work nearly every other day. I... Yeah, stuff hasn't been so great for me for well over a month. I've been trying to get it back on track though, so that things can start finally…

So... I have been doing a lot of work here these past few weeks. Between 2 cons, getting myself over being kind of ill thanks to the seasons changing, and just in general working a whole lot both at my day job and at writing, I have been one busy mutt. I am back to writing in a big way, and work is starting to normalize yet again, even if my schedule is back to one that is utter murder on my sleeping... 3PM to 3AM isn't something that is conducive to me doing much else aside from being tired. It does let me get some writing done though, and now that I feel like I am back on track for the time being in that sense, and have been…

I feel like I have just sunk back into depression these past couple weeks, but it was really only till today that I caught onto it. I haven't been sleeping well, I have barely felt like eating, I haven't been able to produce anything productive out of writing... I don't know where this came from, but it hit me like a ton of bricks tonight. I mean, I would have been okay with it hitting some other time, when I would have had the chance to deal with it, but right now... I don't know if I can handle being like this. Between the stress of work, the fact that a con is rapidly approaching, and just in general feeling like I am worth next to nothing... Well, I am…